....

Oh how I miss this...and doing things like this.

Man, do I miss aysha.

Daydream nation: I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect.

Caroline Wexler: What did you call me?
Jenny: I think I just called you a slut, slut.
Caroline Wexler: Why?
Jenny: Because everyone knows that you've banged, like, forty different guys since you came here.
Caroline Wexler: Really? Forty?
[pause to look in mirror]
Caroline Wexler: Okay, let's just say that I have banged forty guys. What's the problem? You're just jealous because you've been, ah, brainwashed by puritanical assholes who think sex is a sin. But then again, your, ah, little gerbil-sized brain has been reprogrammed by the media to believe that sex is the be-all, end-all. So now you're stuck, right? 'Cause on the one hand you love to fuck, but afterwards you feel overwhelmed by guilt & you're not sure why. Maybe it's because sex is neither as good or as evil as you've built it up to be.
Jenny: [hurt pause] Shut up, slut!
Caroline Wexler: Jenny, seriously, listen to me! The highlight of your entire life is gonna be your yearbook photo. You are already nostalgic for shit that has not even happened yet 'cause you have so precious little to look forward to. You're gonna spend the first half of your life planning your wedding & you're gonna spend the second half regretting it. & if I were you - & thank god I'm not , 'cause you have terrible hair - I would stop & I would reconsider your whole value system, because everything you know is wrong.

What would I do without Douglas Coupland?

"I think that every reader on earth has a list of cherished books as unique as their fingerprints....I think that, as you age, you tend to gravitate towards the classics, but those aren't the books that give you the same sort of hope for the world that a cherished book does."
-Douglas Coupland


I agree with that quote so much, and funny thing is most of his books are on my cherished book list. I reread them over and over, I more or less just carry life after god with me all the time. Nothing makes me feel better like douglas coupland.

But I have other cherished books to. I was thinking about them.
Some books just stay with you because they just mark this point in your life or something.
Books that come to mind for me are: The Secret garden, White Oleander, Speak and The Boddy artist.

maybe this is a cheesy post. I just really enjoy books its such a comfort.

Thinking about dropping out of school....

Thinking about dropping out of school. Thinking about quitting my job and moving back home.
But then again that seems stressful too.
I just dont see the point in doing things that I dont like. I dont like living in the city, I do not like working at a cell phone place so why do I do it?
York is an ugly school.
I'm going to go into huge debt to get a degree in something that I do not even know if I can get a good job in, to pay off my debt.
it all just seems so stressful.
and pointless.
I want to move somewhere else to go to school....

blue over grey over grey over grey

she won't come undone,
doesnt let her heart fill up

she'll never be the one
who gets disappointed at the rain

she's the archer, remember?
who's stinging arrows bring a final conclusion

she'd burn the forrest for her family,
though too involved in the details,

it's not a secret she cares and those individuals should think themselves lucky
because her devotion is fierce

heartfelt and powerful,
her plea to the Great Wide

goes unnoticed, and yet
as unreliable as the universe is,

she wakes from an unfinished dream
and starts this day much the same as the last

-audienceno2